well its weds..i noe i been cheating..haha..wen out wif fiza from pagi..haha..morning seh..hahawent to Np..haha...GUESE WHO I SAW..haha..happy guesing..not gonna tell u..hahadis is for u fiza:THANKS HOR!!!anyway she asked to post it..haha..no lah..haha..anyway i have been thanking her all the way to Rp..haha..fat hope..i forget to bring teh marticulation papers sooo..no lappies..haha..but still i had fun walking up n down the road..haha...

den i called shikin n FORCED her to come down causeway to have lunch together..its been ages since i eat lunch with her..haha..sorry shikin..i gaot to use KEKERASAN!!
we have been laughing n makin noise the moment we started eating...haha...i dun really get to enjoy the food taste..my throat is killing me lar...COUGH!!!!!urghhh..anyone wanna sponsor cough syrup...haha

den went to meet farisha..i miss her man!!shasha:u look great lar..haha..u sae wanna meet me den u laugh jer...haha..do i have a red nose?haha..anyway i wanna meet u soon!!

haha...anyway thanks ehh ppl..i love my WEDNESDAY!!!

FAZLEY-KERNA ASMARA

Inilah kisah seorang wanita
Menawan hati
Dan meninggalkan kekasihnya
Terpinga-pinga

Kerna
Ku terlalu percaya
Pengorbanan ku pastikan
Terbalas akhirnya

Kerna
Ku terlalu setia
Tak mungkin berpaling hati
Walaupun terluka

Namun semua itu
Tak lagi bererti
Takkan pernah lagi
Jadi nyata

Kernamu
Kerna kamu ku jadi begini
Tak pernah melihat diri ini
Walau seringku di sisi ( oh kasih ku )

Masa ku melihat
Dikau menghukum mengguris diri
Tanpa sebarang kata
Mudahnya dikau melangkah pergi
Apa gunanya bersedih
Apa gunanya bercinta
Sekiranya hatiku dah diberi sepenuhnya

Kerna
Asmara yang ku puja
Hanya tinggal bayang-bayang
Di dalam hidupku

Kerna
Asmara yang ku damba
Hanya sebuah bisikan
Pilu di jiwaku

Harusnya ku melihat kau begitu
Rayuan mu membuatku malu dan sakit hati
Cukuplah sudah
Malasku mendengar kesedihanmu
Lupakan saja
Tiada gunanya untuk kau berpilu-pilu

well its 9.40 in the morning now..just get off my bed..i had a headache n sore throat yesterday after goin home from APM!!!haha..let me repeat..APM..hahaha..it was seriusly last minute..my aunt called me on thurs nite to inform me..haha...lucky me*haha..dah dua tahun dapat ticket free*haha...soo me, my mum n my aunt n dis KR sec 1 gurl...her name ehh...sumting nasuha*sorry i forget her name*haha...

okie...i was suprised to see A LOT..i mean A LOT...haha..the girls..n makciks are the worst..*ehh tak baik pulak*aniwae they were dolling themselves like they are presenting the awards..haha..gliterring dress n damn high heels..i wonder...where are they heading after APM'06...hmm..i wonder...aniwae wen we reached max pavillion...A.B Sheikh was the host for 1/2h...haha..i sweared i heard him saying dis"dari mane saye diri,saya boleh nmpk fauzie laily dan kharil yusoff" or he was saying khairul yusoff or..i dunno lar...just wait n read khairul blog n c hu he went wif...haha..soo i got my seat n i saw amalia...she was sitting in fornt of me...woohooo..i love the atmosphere...sooo WOW!!!

soooo the first performance was V.e..they are still de best wen come to dancing..OMG...i tink azmi sempoi is very happy..coz he said he had alwaes wanted to present the award wif rossa...n so..he got her..haha..aniwae i love ello..his song his damn nice lah..wait let sing it for u to refresh urself of him*Selamat tinggal kasih sampai kita jumpa lagi aku pergi takkan lama hanya sekejap saja ku akan kembali lagi asalkan engkau tetap menanti*fuh..meletup seh ...and aniwae i am sooooooo happy to see TAUFIK n FAZLEY.....i miss fazley!!! remeber dis song?*asmara ini yg hanyut kan kita,asmara ini yang hanyut kan aku..*wooohoo...i love him..aniwae he looked very good wen his hair is short again..haha...de one he appeared wif his long hair was the time SITI NURHALIZA wen to LONDON..to perform..he was her some sort of manager..sumting like dat lah...i wish n hoping dat they will fall in love wen they were at london..the royal albert concert hall..sumting like dat lah..haha...i was hoping the rumours to be true seh..haha..fazley is sweet..*honey,u look GREAT!!*hahaha...aniwae marcell looked good with his hair-less head..but i still prefer him with his afro like hair..wooohooo...

aniwae pity SITI seh..*ehh..suke hati dier lah dier nak kahwin ngan datuk..cinta tak mengenal usia beb..asyik perli SITI jer buat ape?ia takkan merubah hati dan perasaan dier.........
JEALOUS (sp?)kape..*i feel sorry for her seh...plz mind ur language ppl...haha..and another person..FIZA O..oh..kakak ku..haha..she oni appeared a few times rite?the beginning n in the middle takde..*den nak habis ader lagi...kesian seh...i love the way she present herself..*

aniwae u all shud be there lah..especially wen the announce the winners..especially wen TAUFIK,SITI,MAWI n PETER PAN won...everybody was like standing n i heard someone shout' TAUFIK I LOVE U!!!*it must be some makcik2..haha*...haha..i was tempted..but my mother beside me lar...but i was shouting all the way...woohoo..and i proud of the song DEALOVA by Once..its pronounced as On-Che not Once..like english..Once upon a time..haha..remeber the song lyric i posted in yellow..arh..dats the song...i love it...haha..i was like dealova plz?den it was them..i woohoo once again..another ting... i love the ratu song..wait let me sing..hmm*Cukuplah saja berteman denganku janganlah kau meminta lebih ku tak mungkin mencintaimu kita berteman saja teman tapi mesra*...haha...

i had super-duper fun..but from where i sit..woah the lighting n sound was superb..haha..even i can feel the vibration of the sound at my seat....best giler...haha.*sampai pening akak*...haha...
den went to eat Mak's place..had my cereal prwans...yummy!!!..haha..den i saw asnida daud,the erlin montel sis,sara, n the chinese looking guy yg host cite jalan2 sumting..the one with his scooter..haha...him..haha..reached home at bout 2+..*head pening nak mampos..headbanging seh kat dalam otak...*thanks mr panadol...haha..lame..

aniwae no pics..coz too many ppl..n i am short lah..*bole arh korang..dah pakai kasut tumit tinggi*haha...

aniwae i am craving DUNKIN DONUTS....woohoo...i am hoping dat the trip to johor is still on..haha..den can buy dunkin donuts...u all want?haha..*by the time masok singapore dah bes arh..haha*

Dunia ini bagaikan satu perlumbaan
Ingin ku mengejar sesuatu
Tapi aku keliru
Apa yang ingin aku kejar?

Langkah langkah ku sangat lemah
Garisan penamat belum lagi kelihatan
Tapi aku sudah bosan dan lelah
Bilakah perlumbaan ini akan sampai ke akhirnya?

Nafas ku tercunggap-cunggap
Bagaikan kehabisan udara di dunia ini.
Aku lemas dengan masalah
Masalah yg tiada pangkal dan penghujung

Apa yang sedang aku mengejar?
Semua kemewahan sudah pun aku lengkapi
Apa lagi kekurangan diri ku?
Jawapannya sendiri tidak ku pasti

Aku rebah ke bumi
Setelah ku puas mengejar sesuatu yang tidak ku pasti
Aku memejamkan mataku
Sambil menghirup nafas panjang

Tanpa aku sedari
Air mataku mengalir
Aku tidak pernah mengenal perasaan yang ku alami ini?
Apakah ini yg selama ini aku cari?

Perasaan yang sangat mulia
Yang tidak pernah aku alami
Aku cuba menahan perasaan ini
Tapi aku sendiri tidak mengetahui apa penyebab nya?

Mungkinkah ini pewarna yang aku kurang dalam hidup ini?

Aku mencari jawapannya
Tapi aku sendiri semakin keliru
Semakin aku cari jawanpannya,
Semakin itu aku dekat pada perasaan itu

Aku terasa tewas
Tidak pernah aku merasakan kekalahan
Mungkin ini kah perasaan sedih
Yang selama ini aku kekurangan

Tiada siapa yang menghampiri ku
Ingin membimbingku dan mendakap ku
Aku merasakan kekecewaan yang pertama
Akhirnya aku mengerti ini adalah perasaan sedih

Aku kini mengerti
Apa itu tangisan dan juga kekecewaan
Aku diselebungi kegelapan dan juga kehampaan
Aku ingin semua ini diakhiri

Well, sometimes love really hurts..
It hurts when..

letting go of a person you've just learned to love

shielding your heart to love somebody

trying to hide what you really feel

trying to hide the tears that eventually fall from your eyes

giving someone up that you never thought you will

hiding your relationship from someone else

agreeing with him to "just be friends"

breaking someone's heart

PRETENDING YOU'RE OKAY WHEN YOU'RE ACTUALLY DYING DEEP INSIDE YOU

PRETENDING TO BE STRONG
..AND RECOGNISING YOUR WEAKNESSES

being in love

letting go even if you really don't want to

seeing the person hurt because of you

sharing the one you love with SOMEBODY else

making a promise.. and realising it when the time has come for that promise to be delivered.. the commitment is no longer there..

well..sunday..ah ha..its supposed to be a resting day...ouh but too bad for me..i was the BABY-SITTER of the day..well my cousins were here for the day..guese i have to work my brain again..well the eldest of them was in primary4 soo..maths was his problem..well it was fun actuali but the tiring thing was to explain the logic for the workings n stuff..haha..i had to do it in two languages..i tink it was rojak lah..haha..actuali i find it weird that i am explaining it in malay...*okie..kita ambik harga ni kali tiga den kita kongsi tiga untuk kawan-kawan*weird tau..my mum was laughing at me wen i explained coz it sound soo alien...haha..well den had to brainstorm idea for his compo..well its picture essay..so okielah..and quite funny coz it is soo memorable n it reminded me of my primary schoolz days...

haha..the next kid was only in primary1..named amizan..(the brother is amirul,the lil sis is ain,the mom is ani,the dad is ali..the are the A's family..)haha..soo he has to study his spelling..and i was like soo fun..haha..i was excited..he is very talkative n catch the things i said to him so easily..haha..soo he said he wanted to learn oni 1-5..soo i asked y?he said he was quite poor in english n the tcher oni give him 5 werds to spell..soo i was Ok with it..he get it all rite..soo i was impressed n he decided to give a try for the other 5..i mean i oni tempt him with a
ice-cream and he said he wanted to try...and so i gave him the paper to memorize..and within 1/2h he cud memorize all 9(except the 10th coz it was long)so i gave him a chance...haha..9/10 was quite impressive rite?given his determination he told his brother to tell his teacher dat he wanted to have 9 spelling werds instead of the normal 5 werds...cute rite?soo i rewarded him not only one but TWo ice-cream sticks.

the lil sis was oni 4..soo i guese i dun have to teach her anything..she was my playdoll for today..i had fun playing n combing her hair...wish i have a lil sister like her..haha..i love her lar...i even bathe her before they leave my place..it was soo sweet.i tied her n put on her night gown..ouh...sweet tau..i love her..she alwaes come to my side wen her brothers are busy playing the playstation..haha...cute tau..urghh i wish she wud want to stay here...haha....soo how?good teacher or baby-sitter?

anyway i miss these two boys INDRA SHAHRIL & INDRA SHAHIRAN..these two boys are take or looked after by my grandma n aunt n mom since the first few months after their birth...their mom wud oni take them home during weekends..anyway they are twins..handsome chad..haha..i remember the times wen my mom wud bring me and the two boys to play at 'playtown'(which was once located on top of ginza)..i stil, remeber we wud have 'picnic' down there n sometime the boys wud even have their nap down after tired playing n running arnd..i miss u...well the ting is the mom wudn't let the boys come over here since they permanently take them away from my grandma wen they are going to primary1...well i guese they will noe hu were the one that looked after them since young...they are the loyal fan*peminat* of my mum's dendeng..the two will often fight as hu will ketuk the daging wen thay want to eat dendeng....haha..i bet till now they still haven noe dat my dad had passed away..coz they were too young to understand..all they can sae was"cik nor keje ehh?"hmm...memories..i still remember they will take the plant spray to spray at my dad's face..haha...memories..i miss u..anyway fiza n kin?do u remember the two boys?..haha:)
i will wait for the day u will come to mak's place after school wen u are old n naughty enuff..haha

n wait..kak ena n abg wan n key came..haha..a.wan u can drive now..haha..love ur hair but too bad..goodbye hair once u go for n.s..haha..love kak ena the most..haha..*Ena..u look great*..

huh cakap pasal nie..hey fiza..BARD still melt my heart...haha...

well..haha..got nutin to do n sae..hahahahahahaha...i am gonna be mad soon...anyway..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASHADIQ!!!

hello...haha..sorry so long never update...haha..okie..i want to update but i am soo tired to type..anyway let me inform u something..haha...actuali nothing...haha...
wait..okie..there is dis indonesia song that i tink is very hot!!

*tittled:Dealova by Once...
Aku ingin menjadi mimpi indah
Dalam tidurmuAku ingin menjadi sesuatuYang mungkin bisa kau rindu
Karena langkah merapuhTanpa dirimu
Oh...
Karena hati tlah letih

Aku ingin menjadi sesuatuYang slalu bisa kau sentuh
Aku ingin kau tahu bahwa akuSelalu memujamu
Tanpamu sepinya waktu Merantai hati
Oh...
Bayangmu seakan-akan

Kau seperti nyanyian dalam hatiku0
yangMemanggil rinduku padamu
Seperti udara yang kuhela
kau selalu ada
Oh...

Hanya dirimuYang bisa membuatku tenang
Tanpa dirimu Aku merasa hilang...
dan sepi
Dan sepi...

Kau seperti nyanyian dalam hatiku
yangMemanggil rinduku padamu
Seperti udara yang kuhela
kau selalu ada

Kau seperti nyanyian dalam hatiku
yangMemanggil rinduku padamu
Seperti udara yang kuhela
kau selalu ada
Selalu ada...
Kau selalu ada...
Selalu ada...
Kau selalu ada...
Sya... na na na...*

okie...haha..aniwae..life has been the same..no...i mean...ok..haha..been goin out like nobody business..haha..and my purse is officially dry..haha....can the transportation be free atleast...haha...plz....haha*fat hope man*

well yesrterdae had a mini O6C6 gathering..it was fun..we watched army daze..aniwae the important thing that i have learnt was that eventhough we are on different journey now....haha..tahnks for everything..n to cheryl..i love ur house..it was like a magic garden..haha..can we go over again?...haha...

well,today accompany shikin to town.to get her skul uniform at Bibi n Baba..haha..okie u must be laughing at the name...haha..okie..penat seh..haha..aniwae eventhou its friday..it will alwaes be packed like weekends..haha...like alwaes..ORCHARD Rd..wat can u expect?..i bet it will never be deserted..haha...

okie..actuali i was watching the forum perdana yesterday..actuali they touched on kasih sayang...n i was wondering wat if *ada org yang kita sayang tu takde perasaan sayang?...haha..
aniwae..dr fadilah kamsah says: tak semua org bahagia senyum..tapi org yang senyum(ikhlas) pasti bahagia*..haha...aniwae i love u..

this entry was supposed to be on 12 Mac 2006 Tuesday

*blog bukan lagi tempat yang jujur*
aku disini BUKAN let me emphasis lagi BUKAN ingin mengata atau menunding jari kepada sesiapa..seperti apa yang kite tau..takde org yang bisa lari dari kesilapan..kadang-kadang aku pon pernah menulis sesuatu yang menyinggung perasaan orang tapi aku harap org boleh maaafkan aku..
blog bukan lagi tempat yang jujur...benar..aku tidak berani meluahkan apa yang terbenam di dalam dasar hatiku didini..bukan kerana aku pengecut..tetapi aku tidak ingin meraih simpati atau kemarahan orang...biarlah rahsia isi hatiku setiasa terbuku dan bukan menjadi bahan tatapan atau ketawa orang*.....

okie enuff the ting i said today..went back to KR to help out in kem Riang Ria..actuali more of sibok-sibok..haha..it was fun..SUPER FUN!!haha..they had four category of budaya they learnt,dikir barat,lukisan batik,tarian zapin dan drama....

overall i enjoyed the drama..haha...guese who was the mentor..*u noe cite Bara?the one taht act as the Proff*..cool kan..*mangkuk betul..batch kite takde*..haha..aniwae i have dis littilwe feeling of trying out drama pementasan like himself n azmi sempoi..haha..i tink i will wait till i can find the correct timing..the zapin oso nice ler..haha..cute..fiza,shikin n nabilah huda had the interest n they maebe wanting to try to get involved in the tarian..haha..actuali it was very interesting lar...haha..

well did u catch the suria latest drama?the 'cinta di akhir bukit'..actuali the acting oklar..but i like the story line..its nice n stuff..the ending is soo sweet

i am :

1. sick... my left side of brain is pain..urghh..*yar been thinking too much..well don't know wat was i thinking aniwae* hmmpff..tahnks to kak ida hu gave me some painkillers*haha..dun worry i won't end up like Eka*

2. rindu(MISSING)... with all my frens.. seems like i cant meet u guys till don't know wen?let the fate decides..

3. rindu lagi.. dgn diaaa.. he is such an ecstasy.. u noe hu i mean?its KHAIRIL MD YUSOFF*alamak dah start aku nye feeling2..haha..ape tidak gamabr dier kat depan aku..haha.*

.4. crazy.. well as usual...haha..no wait not crazy..me best pals gave it a new term..its HIGH..the high feeling..u get it?haha

5. am not ANUGERAH CONCERT...sape nak pergi?
angkat keyboard tinggi-tinggi*oppss..tercabut pulak aku nye wire keyboard*haha..i wanna go but on dat day i may have the freshmen orientation till 6 pm babe...arghhhh how worst can it get*aku nak pergi tau!!!bodoh arh*

6.angry.. u noe wat there is dis makcik(kepo) thought dat i was fiza boifren...OMG..shut up lar makcik...*hey makcik can i have a favour?can i splash the soup on ur face*its is soo embarassing n irritating..urghhh..soo not gonna buy the yong tau fu..haha

7. actuali a bit bored today..mother never werk sooo stucked at home..haha..bad seh...aniwae listening to nana n achik cds..remember dem?especially their sweet lovey-dovey song..haha...wait ar let me recall it for u..."usik-mengusik semakin lama semakin rindu..hati merindu asyik merindu tersentuh rasa..tidak terduga timbullah sayang..andai tak jumpa menjadi gundah..."*woah..so jiwang man..haha*

8. dying to watch movieeee!!! so many movies inlist niii!!! anione wanna go have movie marathon??*wait..do u tink i own the GV?free movie...?movie marathon?..DREAM ON!!*

9. hmmm...elated..actuali suprised..i saw Sudin at clem..u noe the jalan ampas all time favourite comedian actor..i love his movie especially the seniman n pendekar bujang lapok...remeber dis lines"ehh ramlee kau nak gi kerja ke nak jual minyak?"and "ouh-ouh-bomb,meletup"haha...k lah i wanna find those cds...haha..

in da toilet*haiya in toilet oso can ler*
my betest girlfriend*ikept squinching my eyes due to the sun*
blup..blup..going under water in..5..4..3..2..1!!
focus..focus...

ok dis is the pic i took wen we went esp n indulge ourselves with food that i tink can help me expand horizontally..haha..but hu cares...n taking n behaving like fools for the day!!haha....

me n fiza at rp*i like my smile n everything*
nab n me*i look good too*

dis was on our way to sp*haiz panas tau..pon nak ambek gambar*
hmmm..*there a grp of cute boys opposit our table..ahem*

helo..soo dis week was my holidae week...i mean free from school which was orite..i guese*but actuali no..i miss Mi like crazie ok*hahaaniwae been outz for the past three days straight...today was home sweet home...hahawell i will put pictures first the next entry will be filled with werds..haha..
on monday:wen appealed at sp den rp den watch n arcading n eat at causeway
tuesday:wen lavender wif nab n to tiong bahru plaza
wed:wen lavender with fiza n bugis n esplande
aiyoo been out to window shopping oni..maner kerje..haiya..my pockets n purse are all dried up..haha..*ehh ni saya dah teman awak gi sane dan sini..kalau saya nak klua awak kasi alasan..tak tau nak ckp aper tau*

I MISS ALL MY PAE FRENS>>ESPECIALLY SHIKIN,SHASHA,YINMEI,
AZIRAH,REBECCA,YI TINGMENA,HAIYU,
MICHELLE,CHERYL,
AMANDA,KENNY,KAIDI,
FAREEZ,FATHUDIN,
N MS ONG YUAN SHIN!!!!
i can't type animore..its just dat all dis sadness is still lingering around me..i miss my eye candy!!

hello ppl..haha..today enrty maybe quite disturbing to some ppl...i decide to pen down my thoughts after seeing what had been practiced nowadays...
okielah..before i start i would like to extend my apology if dis entry gonna affect u or may have an effect on u..sorry ehh...
u noe it irks me to see borfrens carrying girlfrens bag..haha...i dun mind of it were the shopping bag..but handbag??how about skulbag?OMG!!hahah..too romantic u might sae but..aiyoo..i pity dese grp of victims...which refers to the boys..very pitiful..i mean they still can carry women handbag like its Ok..i mean oklah..but aiyoo..maebe they wanna express themselves o be extra loving to the gurl..but dun the gurl feel a little a bit a shame..its like u r using ur boyfren to carry ur stuff..haha...urghh..but its ur personal life n i dun wan bother..but seriusly..i cannot take dat sight..haha...soorry babes n dudes if i have offended u..argh..cannot get the image out of my head..OMG!!
okielah..i am now tuning to 89.7FM RIA..n syed azmir's song is on air..its is just sooo soothing..i mean the song is soo calming..i love the song..not the singer..no lah just kidding..okielah..how is life??haha..dats all i can sae rite noe..i mean life is never easy man,never..urghh..u noe its like..urghh just very difficult to explain...one point of time i am smiling n laughing away..the next minute i will just mum n have dis anger inside of me..maebe its part of growing up..worst still i have dis constant difficulty to sleep everynight..haha..
sometime i wonder izit because i am too committed to do the things dat i think dat caused me to be thinking about it everynight...urghh..i just hope it wiill come to an end ...it will but the matter of time..
hey guese wat...hmmm..i kinda looney right now..i dunno y..sometime doin reflection is good..n it is ENCOURAGED...u noe..reflection make the person to be a better person for tommorrow..well its best to sit n think about wat had u done the best for the day..n wat was the worst thing u have done?how could it have been better n if u were given a chance why will u do?i mean its better to think wat have u done den just drool n think about it n crying over it..but still crying is still healthy..i alwaes cry to sleep..hahai mean let everything in ur heart out dun alwaes keep to urself..u have to be gentle to urself n not being too harsh to urself..if u are out to hurt urself den nobody can help u to change or mend the situation..i hope i a m making sense coz..i seriusly dunno wat the hell am i trying to sae..haha.hmm soo ppl..chill okie if u are having the most tense moment rite now..just believe in urself n realise dat u r not alone..it will come to an end real soon..think positively n most importantly dun ever hurt urself be it physically or thru emotions..its not healthy...hah..talk to someone dat u r comfortable with n find someone dat u can trust n pour everything out k..take a chill k...believe dat everything will be orite..dardar...take care ppl..remeber dis..wen u tink noone love u..I still love u!!